Ernie strode through the theatre and stood in front of the stage.
He turned around to face Eric.
“This is the perfect place for the play what I wrote!” he said, beaming.
Eric pushed up his glasses.
“Technically, it’s the pantomime what you wrote…oh yes it is!” he replied.
Ernie nodded: “Glenda Jackson’s signed on to play the Wicked Stepmother, and I’ve asked Andre Previn to play Buttons…”
Eric laughed: “Mr Preview! And Angela Rippon is a high-kicking Fairy Godmother…all your greatest hits!”
Ernie walked up the steps to the stage.
“I’ve got the first joke for the King, too,” he said.
“I always take my wife morning tea in my pyjamas, but is she grateful? No. She says she’d rather have it in a cup…”
Eric shook his head: “Already used it…”
Ernie sighed…
“How about this one for Buttons? I have a memory like an elephant. In fact, elephants often consult me…”
Eric moved his glasses up and down.
“Oy! That’s another one of mine and I’ve definitely used it…”
He grabbed a cut out of Glenda Jackson in her panto costume and said, copying her voice: “What do you think of it so far?”
Ernie sighed: “Rubbish…”
Eric clapped him on the back: “You and your short, fat hairy legs will get there, son. Don’t worry. I’m more worried about all the health and safety and data protection we’ll have to do to put on this production.”
Ernie smiled: “All in hand thanks to Penarth Management. Their consultants have ensured our production company and the venue each know what we need to do to stay on the right side of the law.
“We’re even looking at next year and how Martyn’s Law will impact what we have to do. That’s the anti-terror legislation to help improve public safety in venues.”
Eric looked impressed. He turned to the Glenda Jackson cutout and said: “He’s still got it, you know…”
Ernie added: “It’s all about Mango, you see…”
Eric looked puzzled.
“We didn’t have mangoes in the breakfast sketch. They were grapefruits…”
Ernie laughed: “It’s what the online compliance software’s called. Mango. Keeps it all in the cloud so we don’t have piles of paperwork in the office.”
Eric looked up and shrugged: “They can’t touch you for it!”
A theatre worker wheeled a trolley on stage and offered Eric a cup.
He looked at Ernie and smirked as he said: “More tea, ‘Ern?”
Find out how Mango’s online compliance software could help your production company or venue. Book a free demonstration which will be delivered via Zoom. We can help you achieve the ISOs you need, too. Call Penarth Management on 029 2070 3328 or email info@penarth.co.uk
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