The church pantomime needs a Minder…Oh no it doesn’t! It needs Mango…

Dave looked up from wiping a glass at the bar of the Winchester club.

“What’s all that about, Tel?” he asked, nodding over to Arthur Daley in deep conversation with a man in a dog collar.

Terry McCann chuckled: “Arthur thinks he can make a few quid by offering to host the church pantomime at the Winchester. He’s offering the club free with 25 per cent of the ticket sales going into the Winchester’s ‘community fund’ to help the less fortunate.

“The church gets 75 per cent towards the new roof. Arthur says it’s win-win…”

Dave shook his head: “What ‘community fund’? First I’ve heard of it! He’ll get struck down by a bolt of lightning if he’s not careful.”

Terry nodded in agreement: “You don’t have to tell me. I draw the line at profiting off the church. Which is why I spoke to the verger earlier and told him to get the vicar to ask about health and safety and plans to keep the public safe under the new Martyn’s Law. The church leaders and the venue owners will need to think about it. Don’t think Arthur has factored that into his calculations.”

Dave laughed: “Looks like he’s asking right now. Arthur’s gone a bit pale! I told him we’d need to get some expert advice on it before we stage public events in our marquee that could attract a few hundred people.

“We’re looking at new legal duties to help protect the public from terrorist attacks and the new law will be implemented soon. We need a detailed risk assessment and plans for communication on the day, not to mention adequate staff training…”

Terry snorted: “Staff? That’d be me then! Anyway, I put the verger in touch with Penarth Management. Their consultants help places of worship like theirs comply with their legal duties and are very knowledgeable about Martyn’s Law.”

Dave looked impressed: “How did you meet them, then?”

Terry smiled: “Worked the door for one of their other clients, a local nightclub. The manager introduced me.”

Dave sighed: “Bound to be a lot more paperwork, though.”

Terry shook his head: “Nah! Mango…”

Dave said: “Not that type of bar, Tel! A slice of lemon in a G and T counts as a cocktail here!”

Terry laughed: “No, online compliance software called Mango. It keeps all the documents in the cloud so no more piles of paperwork. Access it wherever there’s an internet connection.”

Dave smiled: “You mention this to Arthur?”

Terry nodded: “He kept looking up through the sunroof and saying: ‘Won’t the documents fall down on us?’ I couldn’t stop laughing!”

Arthur looked downcast as he walked over: “Time to get to the bookie’s.”

Terry stood up and bowed: “Your carriage awaits, Cinderella. You shall go to the ball!”

Arthur scowled.

• Find out how Mango’s online compliance software could help your events or your place of worship. Book a free demonstration which will be delivered via Zoom. We can help you with a Martyn’s Law assessment, too. Call Penarth Management on 029 2070 3328 or email info@penarth.co.uk

• Need information on Martyn’s Law? Take a look at the programme of free seminars from our sister company The Protect Alliance: Events | The Protect Alliance (UK)